Where art thou, "off" button?

I need to desperately switch off for real...

I'm breaking down physically, mentally, emotionally, and now its affecting me spiritually..

I totally didnt concentrate on my Quiet time when I was doing..

I cannot concentrate on my work, and whatever is there to concentrate..

I felt like a zombie when people talk to me, i still laugh, joke and talk on cue.. But i feel totally dry.....

I need my sleep.. and is not coming.. Been skipping my naps, hoping i can sleep at night, not working... Took some camomile tea but not working too.. Gonna dry more tea though.. I like the warm feeling... 

I need to cry, i think my eyes too dry...

I'm still having nightmares with the little amount of sleep i get..

God.. Please...

Feeling a little numb...

I think the drought season came....

Even during days like these, i am looking forward to my rainbow days with God..

Gotta keep counting my blessings, stop the self destruction..

Keep looking at Jesus, not men, at Heaven, not earth.

Problem is i just wanna go to my Heavenly Home.. and that's a bit not good in some sense..

God.. Help me..

Failure...

If i cannot even do my best at one thing that i am passionate about, I felt i had really failed myself..

Never felt so disappointed with myself..

Praying that this low point in my life will be over, probably with enough rest and lesser pain...

Been having continuous nightmares about losing my children, and cannot sleep well..

Breaking down physically and mentally.. I hope someone else's life is much better than my..